Die Men, Die!
by Gothic Butterfly
Summary: Rating for language and actions of women :) What happens when the women go crazy, and then men have to run for their lives? *experiment*
1. Default Chapter

Authors Note: First of all, I have no idea what you all may think of this fan fiction. I woke up one day and was just laughing and laughing about this idea. Hopefully you'll laugh as hard as I did, and if you don't...you might think I'm crazy. Oh well, either way, ENJOY!

Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha or any of the characters.

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InuYasha woke with a nightmarish smell clogging his senses. When he realized that it was coming from both of the girls, he hopped out of his tree to warn Miroku. For in times like this, men really have to stick together. Otherwise, they may not survive.

Kagome woke and immediately went running into the forest with her oversized yellow back pack. "Oh please tell me I didn't forget any! Oh, thank goodness. There they are." As quick as she could, she fixed her little problem and walked calmly back to the camp. When she got there, she realized both Miroku and InuYasha were up, but they were both ignoring her. Shrugging, she set her pack down and began to roll up her sleeping bag. And that's when the cramps hit. A sudden wave of nausea and pain hit her, and she fell face first onto her sleeping bag. THUMP  
Miroku and InuYasha both jumped from there seats on the ground to stare at Kagome. She sat up blushing, but white as a sheet. "Hehe...sorry guys, must have slipped." Crossing her fingers behind her back, she hoped that they would believe her. InuYasha would be the hardest one to fool. But much to her surprise, they both just kind of looked at her strangely and sat back down. whew Kagome then slowly turned and rummaged through her pack once again, this time to find her trusty bottle of Midol (I do not own Midol). When she found it, she took a couple of pills and decided to just move carefully until they kicked in. Once her sleeping bag was rolled up and packed, she sat down and waited for Sango to wake up.

_Oh man, oh man...why now? Of course I just have to be traveling with two guys too. Grrr_... Thought Sango, for she was already awake. She was having the same problem as Kagome, but didn't have anything to use. So she just lay on her blankets, willing the males of the group to go do some male bonding activity. Maybe they would go hunting, or sparing away from the camp. Sighing again, she decided to act like she'd finally woken up. Sitting up, she rubbed her eyes and got her bearings. When she remember where the hot spring was, she silently got Kagome's attention and got up and walked off, with her blankets wrapped around her. Kagome thought she knew what was going on, so she grabbed her pack and followed a grumpy looking Sango. The men just watched the two women leave, thankful they hadn't been paid attention to as of yet.  
When Kagome reached the hot spring, Kagome found Sango already bathing. She joined her quickly, and they had a female bonding conversation about the horrible monthly visits and cramps. After they were squeaky clean, they got out, dressed, and headed back towards camp. They both were wondering why neither InuYasha nor Miroku had peeked at them. Then, their thoughts met the same conclusion at once. InuYasha. He'd smelled it and warned Miroku and Shippo. Though it was nice of him not to mention anything to them out loud, the hanyou was going to get his ass pounded. Nobody, _especially_ males, mess with women when they're like this…unless they have a death wish of course.  
When the women reached camp, they both stood in front of InuYasha, glaring at him. He quietly swallowed and looked up at them. "Feh...You two ready to go yet?" He asked, with only a slight trembling in his voice. When they just kept staring, he looked towards Miroku and Shippo for help. Miroku waved his hands in front of him and silently mouthed "No way, you're on your own!" InuYasha just grumbled at him and turned his attention back to the two women in front of him. Both of them were now sporting dark looks and flames. _Oh shit_, he thought, and then…he was gone. All that was left was a little dust statue of InuYasha.  
"YOU DAMN HENTIA! YOU GET BACK HERE!" Both of the girls screamed at once, grabbing their weapons and taking off after the hanyou. Miroku and Shippo turned to each other and sighed in relief as they watched the two women disappear into the forest.


	2. The beginings of Retaliation

Die Men, DIE!!!

Chapter Two

Disclaimer:  I do not own Inu Yasha. Dangit!!!

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            We find ourselves in the middle of a forest, watching as two young women beat the living hell out of a white haired half demon.  Now many of you may be thinking, 'What did he do to disserve this?'  But actually it's the opposite of that.  'What didn't he do?' you ask, well…you should remember from chapter one…hehe…(sorry it was soo long ago :S)

            "DAMNIT!!! I HATE MEN!!!  I WISH THEY WOULD ALL DIE!!!!!"  A very cramped Sango yelled.  Her frustrated words ringing throughout the woods.

"Me too." Kagome calmly agreed, while dusting her hands together.  She stood over an unconscious Inu Yasha with a smirk on her face.  "We should really do this more often.  I know it does more for me than just saying 'sit'." She smirked when the unconscious form sunk deeper into the ground.  "Plus, I think he realizes what he did wrong quicker this way."

"Yeah," snickered Sango.  "Especially when you ask him questions and beat him over the head when he answers wrong!!!"

After that they both broke out in laughter.  Then they heard the mumbling sounds of the hanyou waking up.  Sighing, they both raised their clubs and bonked him over the head again.  Then, giggling evilly once again, they walked off towards camp.

Miroku smiled calmly at the two women as they walked into the small clearing.  When they silently acknowledged him, he went back to sipping his tea.  He reminded himself not to do any groping or make any hentai comments until they were out of the _crazy mood swings and _insanely_ evil stage. (*hint, hint* He's beginning to think they become possessed by some sort of youkai with a grudge against men.)_

About half an hour later, a severely beaten up Inu Yasha emerged from the forest.  His clothing torn and covered in dirt and leaves.  Upon spotting the two happily chatting females on the other side of camp, he grimaced and fell to the ground near Miroku.  Sitting up a little, he reached under his body and picked up the rock that was stabbing his bruised rib.  Tossing it off in an unknown direction, he plopped back down on the ground to wait for the healing process to take over.

Miroku sighed as he finished his latest cup of tea.  The girls had been chatting for a few hours now, and neither one of the men wanted to risk interrupting the good mood.  But they did need to leave.  Looking at each other, silently they came to an agreement.  Calling Shippo over, they began to scheme.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, I stink, I can't even write very much when I do update. *grins evily*  But I do kind of feel bad for leaving the few readers I have hanging for so long.  Did anyone else go through MAJOR withdrawl when fan fiction.net was down a few days ago? I sure did…hehe…made me realize how much torture I was putting people through :S 


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